ILSA , QUEEN OF THE GRIND HOUSE by Dave Goode

If you're a fan of  " men's sweat mags " then you might also be a fan of the Ilsa movie series starring Dyanne Thorne. ILSA SHE - WOLF OF THE SS (1975 ) , ILSA , HAREM KEEPER OF THE OIL SHIEKS ( 1976 ) and ILSA TIGRESS OF SIBERIA (1977 ). There was a fourth flick ILSA THE WICKED WARDEN ( 1977 ). But that was originally a movie titled GRETA THE WICKED WARDEN about another psychotic dominitrix. The title was obviously changed to capitalize on the success of the Ilsa movies.

Born Dorothy Ann Seib in Park Ridge , New Jersey Dyanne Thorne began her show biz career as a band vocalist and stage actress in New York. She appeared on comedy albums with Allen & Rossi , ,Loman & Barkley and Vaughn Meader. She would appear on a number of television variety  shows and television series. To fans of the original STAR TREK she is " Girl No. 1 " on the classic episode A Piece Of The Action. Her buxom figure would lead to roles in grind house  movie like SIN IN THE SUBURBS ( 1964 ) and nudie - cuties like THE EROTIC ADVENTURES OF PINOCCHIO ( 1971 ). And then in 1975 she would take on the role that would lead her to cult stardom.

Ms. Thorne standing 5' 7" 123 lb. ( 37 - 22 -35 ) figure looked like the embodiment of the Nazi she - devils that tortured captured American soldiers on the covers  of men's adventure mags in the 60s.

It got me to thinking that she would have been the perfect foil for Steve Holland and Eva Lynd in one of those alternate universe war movies I keep imaging that duo starring in.

SILVER AGE MYSTERY ARTIST by Dave Goode

As a preteen during the Silver Age of Comics there was this one artist at DC who really caught my eye. But I had no idea what his name was. I only saw his work in back - up stories. Reprints from the 1940s and 1950s. Or at least that's what I surmised by the archaic clothing and hairstyles the characters sported. And at time credits were rarely given on stories. The stories were different as well. No superheroes. They were crime dramas , mysteries and tales of suspense. Sometimes with science fiction or supernatural overtones. I would later find out this mystery artist was Ruben Morira also known as Rubimor.

Ruben Moreira ( 1922 -1984 ) was born in Puerto Rico and moved to New York City with his mother when he was four. Artistically gifted he began working for Fiction House where among other things he drew the adventures of Kaanga , an ersatz Tarzan. This would serve as an excellent training ground. From 1945 to 1947 he would take over the art chores on King Features' Tarzan comic strip from legendary illustrator Burne Hogarth. And illustrated it under the name Rubimor while continuing to work in comics of the Golden Age.

It's hard to describe Moreira's work. Except to say it's reminiscent of Reed Crandall's. Or to say it looks like Curt Swan's. But with more detail. Like Swan he was a master of facial expressions. Something that helped make him a great story teller. And that's what being a comic book / strip artist is all about. Being able to tell a story. Not just drawing pretty pictures.

CALL ME B'WAN! by Dave Goode

One of my favorite pieces by Frank Frazetta was the cover to National Lampoon No. 13 ( April 1971 ) A neat little parody / homage to men's sweat mags. Specifically those featuring jungle adventures. The ones with great white hunters rescuing girls in torn blouses.

As a fan of Columbia's Jungle Jim movie series starring Johnny Weissmuller I can't help but be drawn to them. In fact those magazine covers remind me quite a bit of the movie posters illustrated  by Glenn Cravath for that series loosely based on the popular comic strip from King Features.

It's too bad no movie producer took a cue from them and made some low - budget flicks based on the stories found in MEN'S ACTION , WORLD OF MEN , MAN'S STORY , ADVENTURE and others.

This would have been ideal for Sam Katzman a.k.a  " Jungle " Sam. The man who took former screen Tarzan Johnny Weissmuller Johnny Weissmuller put him in safari clothes and with the help of stock footage turned him into a low - budget version of cartoonist Alex Raymond's Jungle Jim.

THE " REAL " MIKE HAMMER by Dave Goode

Watching KISS ME DEADLY ( 1955 ) again the other day I was taken by what a great movie it really is. One of those films that film historians gush over. And rightfully so. I just have one problem with it. The hero in it played by Ralph Meeker just isn't Mike Hammer. The character that he's portraying.

Directed by Robert Aldrich from a screenplay by A. I. Bezzerides the movie is based very loosely on a novel by Mickey Spillane. Mike Hammer as played by Ralph Meeker is an unethical thug without a moral compass. Spillane's Hammer was a tough as they come street - fighter who could get down and dirty with the bad guys and give as good as he got. But he did have a code of ethics.

Mike Hammer had been brought to the big screen before. First in I THE JURY (1953 ) the adaptation of Spillane's first hit novel from 1947. This one starred Biff Elliott and Peggy Castle. Next up was MY GUN IS QUICK ( 1957 ) an adaptation of the Spillane novel of the same name starring Robert Bray as Mike Hammer. Darren MacGavin also played the private eye from 1958 to 1960 on the television series MICKEY SPILLANE'S MIKE HAMMER.

Spillane himself would play Mike Hammer in THE GIRL HUNTERS ( 1962 )
based on his novel of the same name. And Spillane certainly looked the part. Though a bit shorter than most of us imagine Hammer to be. But he's rugged and looks as tough as an overcooked steak. He's by no means a trained actor. But he does have a screen presence. And his speech pattern ( surprise ) sounds like Hammer's. And unlike the actors who had played Hammer up to this time he carried a .45 M1911A.

THE GIRL HUNTERS revolves around the search for Hammer's secretary Velda , who he believes to have been killed. The story is everything you'd expect from a Mike Hammer movie. There are shoot - outs. And there is an especially brutal fight between Hammer and a communist agent called the " Dragon ". There is only one " Doll " in the flick. But she is played by sexy Shirley Eaton who would go on to play the golden girl in GOLDFINGER (1964 ). Hammer falls in love with her. And for anyone who has read Spillane's books knows what this means.

WILLIAM SMITH...VAMPIRE-SLAYER by Dave Goode

 

For years I've imagined some American movie producer back in the 1960s making masked wrestler flicks. The heroes portrayed most likely by the stars of the European sinew & sandal movies.The American bodybuilders who traveled from Muscle Beach to Italy to play Hercules, Maciste, and Ursus. Actors like Steve Reeves, Rock Stevens (Peter Lupus), and Mark Forest. But especially Gordon Scott, Dan Vadis, and Brad Harris.

 

 

Recently I was watching GRAVE OF THE VAMPIRE (1972) again and thought the perfect name taking, butt kicking answer to Mexico's Blue Demon could have been "Big" Bill Smith, King of the Biker Flicks, who would play a professional wrestler in the 1978 sports drama BLOOD AND GUTS. But without a mask.

 

 

 

 

GRAVE OF THE VAMPIRE directed by John Hayes from a screenplay by Hayes and David Chase (Kolchak) has gained a cult following over the years. The story has actor Michael Pataki playing Caleb Croft a rapist/murderer who rises from his grave a vampire after being electrocuted 30 years earlier. He brutally attacks a young couple who are making out in a parked car in a grave yard. And maybe it's just me. But can you think of a less romantic place to make love than in a grave yard? Killing the man the vampire rapes the woman in an open grave.

 

 

The woman gives birth to a strange gray hued baby. It of course is the child of her undead attacker. But she is a bit unhinged after her attack. And believes the baby to be the child of her murdered boy friend. This is the reason she continues to carry the child after she is told the baby is a parasite draining her of blood from within. After giving birth she continues to feed him with her own blood. Sending her to an early grave. There is one very eerie seen that shows the child watching from the shadows as other children play in the sun.

 

 

 

 

 

The grown son James Eastman played by William Smith tracks down his vampiric father who is now teaching night courses in the occult under the name Professor Lockwood. The climax of the movie has father and son throwing down against each other in a battle of good vs. evil. Not quite as good as the fight Smith had in the movie DARKER THAN AMBER (1970). But then what is? And it does make you think of Smith opening a can of whup @#$$ on other supernatural menaces. 

 

 

 

 

Art by Vance Capley

 

 

 

QUEEN OF THE DRIVE - IN by Dave Goode

If you're a fan of B - Movies and Drive - In fare of the 70s then the name Claudia Jennings isn't unfamiliar to you. Born Mary Eileen Chesterton on December 20 , 1949 she would sta in flicks like THE UNHOLY ROLLERS ( 1972 ) , TRUCK STOP WOMEN ( 1974 ) GATOR BAIT ( 1974 ) and THE GREAT TEXAS DYNAMITE CHASE ( 1976 ).

 

 

 

 

 

 

After graduating from high school in 1968 she joined the Hull House theater company in Chicago while taking a job as a receptionist at Playboy. There she was discovered by noted photographer Pompeo Posar. The titian haired beauty with her 5' 6" 35 - 23 - 36 115 lb. measurements was the epitome of Hugh Hefner's " girl next door " ideal. And she became Playmate of the Month ( Nov. 1969 ) and Playboy of the Year for 1970.

In 1971 she would make her film debut in fifth billed in JUD , A small film about a Viet Nam vet returning home at Christmas to a reception he wasn't expecting. From there she would become a star in exploitation movies. In 1973 she had a role as a talent agent on an episode of THE BRADY BUNCH titled  " Adios Johnny Bravo ". Aaron Spelling had wanted Claudia to replace Kate Jackson on CHARLIE'S ANGELS. But the network was afraid of casting the former Playmate. And the part went to Shelly Hack.

Tragically Claudia Jennings would die in an automobile accident at 29

SON OF STONE by Dave Goode

 

Cowboys and Dinosaurs are cool. And have appeared in comic books and movies like THE BEAST OF HOLLOW MOUNTAIN ( 1956 ) and THE VALLEY OF GWANGI ( 1969 ). But still cooler were Indians and Dinosaurs. Specifically the heroes of the comic book feature Turok , Son of Stone from Dell Comics and Gold Key Comics.

The feature first appeared in Four Color Comics No. 596 ( Oct. - Nov. 1954 ). The second appearance  would be a year later in Four Color Comics No.656 ( Oct. 1955 ) before receiving it's own title Turok , Son of Stone No. 3 ( March - May 1956 ). The comic followed the adventures of Turok and his younger brother Andar. These two pre - Columbian Native Americans find themselves lost in one of those isolated lost valleys populated by dinosaurs and cave people. A standard comic book and B - Movie cliches. The concept was reportedly inspired by writer Gaylord Du Bois visits to the Carlsbad Caverns in New Mexico.

More than once I've imagined Jay Silverheels ( 1912 - 1980 ) starring in a movie adaptation of Turok , Son of Stone. The Canadian - Mohawk was born Harold J. Smith on the Six Nations of The Grand River the grandson of Mohawk Chief A. G. Smith. An outstanding lacrosse player Silverheels was best known as portraying the Lone Ranger's faithful Indian companion Tonto on television and in the movies.

Of course the other star of any Turok movie would be the head of the special effects department. And in my 1950s Turok , Son of Stone that would be the Wizard of Dynamation Ray Haryhausen.